I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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