Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize