Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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