I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
