They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
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