He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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