ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
