I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
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