i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
