He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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