No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
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