I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize