had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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