I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
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