direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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