Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
