Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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