whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Randomize
