Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
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