My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
