with your own penis?
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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