lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
