I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Randomize