I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
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