Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
