i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
