It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Randomize
