I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
