I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
