Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
