thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
