you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Randomize
