fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
