we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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