No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Randomize
