u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
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