need another drink. this is the easiest way
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
