Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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