Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize