**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Randomize
