My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
Randomize
