just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
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