We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
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