She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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