Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
