She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
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