I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
