Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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