i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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