Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
