I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize
